Grateful Friday!

I had one of those weeks where it was incredibly busy and lots happened but yet nothing of any real significance. I'm just drained and so glad it's finally the weekend! This week I'm grateful for:

* finally getting my library card, felt so good to browse the stacks
* visits from 4 different cousins this week, always fun catching up!
* waking up to a thunderstorm, I just love storms
* playing around with my nephews and nieces, they're my heart
* my 3 dogs behaving in Pets.mart and not being assholes to other dogs
* finding my extra Scentsy warmer and putting it in my room, it smells yummy now!
* fun plans this weekend for Easter that involve beer, food and lots of family

I had an odd moment earlier today. Some friends from AR texted a video announcing their second pregnancy to our group of friends, but not to me. One of my BFFs mentioned it, not knowing I wasn't included. It stung twice- once for them announcing it as they held their barely 1 year old and once for realizing they no longer count me as a friend since the divorce, guess XH got them in our split. It seems no matter how far I get from the split, the reminders still pop up and that just sucks.

Use Somebody

Immediately following last week's post, I received a text from my BFF informing me she was in labor. Thus began my downward spiral and what was a really bad IF week. I was a mess and it pissed me off. I can't believe her having her baby bothered me so much but it did. It made me so sad and depressed which in turn angered me for being so bitter. It was an all around yucky week with freezing/icy weather, C causing an electrical mishap and our beloved Longhorns being defeated. But, after drinking large volumes of wine, beer and margaritas this past weekend, I am having a good week this week. Well, I'm fighting our insurance company to cover part of C's surgery and playing phone tag, yet again, with Dr. L's office but other then that, it's all good!

13 days until the surgery and 2 weeks until my birthday, that week can't get here fast enough. I am regretting scheduling the surgery right before my birthday but it was the best we could do with C's job. I'm also hoping that he's all cleared by Valentine's Day for some hanky panky (bow chicka bow wow!!) but given that he's having 2 different procedures done, there is no telling. I decided to ask my Mom to come along to keep me company and help me navigate the Medical Center in Houston, which I find very confusing and intimidating. She'll be in the waiting room while I sit with C before and after the surgery, so she won't be exposed to anything private!

I know I keep saying it but I am so ready to get this show on the road so we can put it behind us. I wish we could fast forward a couple of months to C's next SA, I am already getting anxious about it. I just have so many worries and questions about our TTC future. This weekend we had dinner with one of C's co-workers and his wife, we are going to become great friends, I can tell. They have been dealing with IF for about 6 years and we had such an incredible conversation. She's also a mid-wife, which I am in awe of! Here is a woman struggling with IF but delivering babies! She told me it, obviously, doesn't bother her but that baby showers, baby stores and Mother's Day just kill her, which I definitely can relate to. I didn't pry so I'm not sure what exactly is their diagnosis but I do know it's complicated and she has endometriosis. She gave me great advice and I am so lucky to have her in my life! I also like knowing that C has someone he can vent to that is so understanding.

IF is such a lonely road, it's not one you are glad to have follow travelers on, but it's comforting to know that you are not alone.