February 24, 2010


I fell in love yesterday. It was instant love, the kind that is so rare and yet so amazing. That kind of love that just speaks to your heart and makes you so happy inside. It really is all ICLW's fault so thanks for that ICLW. I found this blog The Infertile Mind and I was done for! ::sigh:: It's amazing.

I had been thinking about a future blog post about IF obsession when I found her blog. It really hit the nail on the head for me. I've been thinking about this a lot lately and in my 22 months of TTC, I've come to realize just how uncomfortable people are with IF. I don't just mean IF people, I mean fertile people. People who think about getting pregnant and BAM, they are, just like that! Those people really get squeamish around IF. They don't like to talk about it, hear about it, be around it or anything.

One of my SIL's is one of these people, never fails to ask me how I am but when I start talking about our latest plan of IF attack, she quickly changes the subject to the most random thing possible. The latest example? She abruptly started talking about the small town they currently live in after she asked me about IVF. Um, ok, change the subject then!

My BFF is also one of these people. Only she never asks me about IF and when I bring it up, she nods along for a few minutes before bringing up her cousin-in-law's battle with IF and how she never felt the way I do about IF and oh, did I catch the latest episode of Real Housewives? Not only does she not want to hear about my IF, she edges in a little slam against me too. Ain't she a peach?

Even my Mom is guilty of this, she gets very uncomfortable when I talk about anything IF related. So does my MIL, but she is a whole other blog post in herself, stupid witch. Anyway, I've come to realize that people don't like how open I am about our IF. Bad enough that I'm IF but I like to talk about it too! GASP!

Yeah, maybe I am borderline obsessed with IF and maybe I talk about it too much but do I complain about people yapping on and on about their kids? Or their jobs? Or their anything? Nope, I pretend to listen while thinking about our next doctor appointment, like any good friend/sister-in-law/daughter. They should take a page out of my book!


  1. I feel the same way. Obsessed. Although recently I've been able to channel my obession into budgeting :)
    I only have one friend that doesn't change the subject or get quiet when I talk about IF. She is a blessing.

  2. This happens to me all the time. Now I don't even bother telling people about it. Even my mom and my sister get all weirded out when I start talking about it IVF and then it just irritates me and puts me in a bad mood. So, to save myself and them, I've just given up.

    It sucks, because you feel like you're on your own, but that's why I have a blog!

  3. People don't get it and that's why I'm so glad for you and your support and our board.

    At least we get it.

    Thanks for visiting my blog cutie.

  4. I encounter the same thing with my BFF. So, now I don't really talk about it unless she brings it up.

  5. Ah its so hard NOT to be obsessed. TTC and IF totally take over your life. Its the kind of thing that can just engulf you and I think people who have never experienced it just dont get it! Hence all the IF blogs :) It is good to be able to talk non stop about it if you want to without people looking at you like you have three heads!


  6. Thanks...but I chickened out this morning. LOL I just couldn't do it. Rescheduled it for the end of next month.

  7. I'm not so sure it;s obsession. We all focus on what's improtant to us, what matters, what afftects us and making a baby is what is currently driving us crazy. So we talk about it. To not talk about it wouldn't be healthy and tough luck to the stupid people who can't handle it.

    BTW thank you THANK YOU for recommending the Infertile Mind blog - brilliant!

  8. It's been my experience that very few people in IRL get this. I have one close friend IRL who is supportive and I am very grateful for her. Last summer, when I was going through this for the first time she told me that she had no idea how physically, emotionally, and financially taxing IVF was until she saw me go through it. If it weren't for her support, your support, the support of the online IF community, and my blog I would go stark raving mad. Literally.