By chance, C had work training in Houston this week and I tagged along so I could spend some time with our families. While I'm happy to have the time with C, I'm wishing I had stayed in AR. I am just miserable and can't wait to get back home. The humidity isn't helping my mood much either or my hair for that matter, ugh.
I have been feeling pretty down lately, just really depressed and stressed out thinking about our upcoming IVF. I really, really don't want to cycle in Houston. The thought of being here all summer is getting me down. I would much rather go through IVF in the comfort of my own home, away from all the questions and concerns of our families. My parents and my ILs are annoyingly involved, something I hadn't wanted. If the cycle fails, the pain is going to be that much worse because they will all know. I've been brainstorming ways to keep the ET a secret so they won't know when I'm in the 2ww. But, it'll be hard since I'll be staying at my parents house, which is next door to my ILs. FML.
The problem is, I love our doctors here and I know the best chance of this working for us is with them. I know this is where we need to be for our IVF, I will do anything and go anywhere for the chance of a successful IVF. I'm just terrified that the stress of doing it here will cause our IVF to not work. Super terrified and being here right now, is just making me stress about it more and realize how hard it's going to be. Our whole cycle on display before our families and C not being able to be here more then a couple of weeks...it's just all freaking me out. A lot.