Wednesday was a flurry of doctor appointments and information. First up was my new Houston based RE and we both love him. The only downside is that he is also an ob/gyn so we sat in his waiting room with a ton of pregnant women. I had a date with the dildo-cam on my birthday and that was, like always, a treat. RE said my ovaries are wearing pearls...best description ever of cyst-covered PCOS ovaries! Anyway, IVF in Houston is cheaper than IVF in Little Rock but much more inconvenient with us living in Arkansas and all that. ::sigh::
After my RE, we met with Dr. L to go over everything. That is when it all went to hell and turned my birthday into a really crappy day. They froze two pieces of tissue and the third was examined for sperm. There were only 3. They believe the other two pieces contain that same amount. Dr. L informed us that he was incorrect in believing there were two blockages and that we won't be able to ever conceive on our own because there were no blockages. We cried and cried.
Turns out, C was born with something called Y Chromosome Micro-Deletion. Lightning struck my poor husband at conception. He is missing the pieces of DNA that control sperm production and has azoospermia due to a birth defect. The only way we can conceive is through IVF with ICSI. But, they suggested we also do PGD on our embryos. C will pass this defect on to our sons and they will pass it on to their sons, all males from C on will be IF and need assisted reproductive technology. We cried even more.
Dr. L set up an appointment with a genetic counselor and we rushed over to meet her after Dr. L depressed us. She reinforced everything they told us and suggested transferring only girl embryos. We've been in a daze ever since Wednesday aka the crappiest birthday ever.
Do we roll the dice and risk cursing our son with IF? Do we PGD our embryos? How will we be able to look our hypothetical son in the face knowing that he won't be able to conceive? Did Natural Selection decide to hate C? Is this nature's way of saying C shouldn't reproduce? Why are these questions so hard and the answers so elusive? WHY? WHY? WHY?
What the hell are we going to do?